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My Language

They say a poem's not really a poem until you share it with someone else. And that's what this place is all about.
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nia
Beautiful Soul
Posts: 256
Joined: May 30, 2009, 5:25 am
Location: Turkey, Istanbul
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Post by nia » April 14, 2010, 1:49 am

My Language

My weak language
into the words
should be playing
a game to me,
I lost my way
all I remember
I was holding
a heart
in a flower
basket...

30 March 2010
nia sunset

Thank you,
with my love,
nia
"My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness." Dalai Lama
http://knitting-diary-of-nia.blogspot.com/
http://blue-silence-of-nia.blogspot.com
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STAReye
Beautiful Soul
Posts: 518
Joined: December 20, 2009, 8:17 pm
Location: Brampton,Ontario CA
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Post by STAReye » April 16, 2010, 8:30 pm

I was holding/a heart/in a flower/ basket.....metaphorically placing a watermark on the mind as you play with language. A good write.
Thanks for sharing.

Leonard
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Davidf
Beautiful Soul
Posts: 640
Joined: January 22, 2010, 4:41 pm
Location: Islandia, NY
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Post by Davidf » April 18, 2010, 2:51 pm

nia,
Like Leonard, I thought the last four lines were the best. Another great one by you!
~Davidf
Have a blessed day!
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Lion~*
Everything In Moderation
Posts: 1896
Joined: February 2, 2004, 1:52 pm
Location: Canada
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Post by Lion~* » April 19, 2010, 10:22 am

I lost my way
all I remember
I was holding
a heart
in a flower
basket...


There is no weakness in the words you've chosen here! Well phrased and felt out! ;)
Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart...William Wordsworth

Follow your honest convictions, and stay strong. - William Thackeray

The bottom line, especially for my character,
is the issue of unconditional love.”
Matthew Weeden
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Morning Bear
Beautiful Soul
Posts: 590
Joined: November 6, 2007, 2:32 pm
Location: Wisconsin - USA
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Post by Morning Bear » April 22, 2010, 7:24 pm

This is so beautiful Nia - and I nearly missed it, but now it is all the more precious - like finding the first trillium of the season, hidden next to a log in the woods. It is sacred because you found it and you didn't know it existed, and nearly walked right by it - but now you stand in wonder at its beauty.

So it is with this glorious little poem of yours - simple yet intricate beauty...thank you,

Zane
For me to believe in you doesn't require that you believe in me,...it only simply requires that you know and thus become all that you are meant to be. MB
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summerrain
Beautiful Soul
Posts: 257
Joined: April 25, 2007, 1:55 pm
Location: las vegas
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Post by summerrain » May 1, 2010, 12:19 pm

Enjoyable & Lovely!!! :^

Thank you for sharing!!

~~~Summerrain~~~
Life is like a coin,
You can spend it any way you wish,
but you can spend it only once"
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